The poison leaves bit by bit, not all at once. Be patient. You are healing.
The poison leaves bit by bit, not all at once. Be patient. You are healing.
I love you like a child looking at the stars without being able to touch them
In the middle of my depression, my boyfriend, who was my best friend, and I broke up. For a week, I just sat in my room crying, hanging out with my liquid friend Jose Cuervo, watching Gilmore Girls, and eating Dominos pizza. It was completely unhealthy and made everything feel worse. I decided to make a plan to try to pick me up and help my mental state. This is what I did and it has been helping:
Admit that I’ve been depressed– I finally admitted that, yes, I am depressed. I am one of the persons who fits the criteria for Major Depressive Disorder. I’ve studied this inside and out, and I know I need help. I know I needed to reach out to professionals to help myself cope with stressors in my life that I cannot control.
Get out of my room– I live on a campus and I didn’t leave my place for about a week. It first started just walking to Starbucks right outside my door, but it was a step. After that, I walked to different places in the city that I live in.
Talk and hang out with a close friend– I arranged day dates with a close friend of mine who knows what I’m going through. We have gone shopping, we walked around the city, and we even got coffee. Just talking to her and being active made me feel a little better.
Meditate– I used to be a very spiritual person a couple of years ago and I let my spirituality fade. I started to meditate each night before I went to bed to clean my chakras, as well as meditate in the morning to hope for some positivity in the day. I realized that negativity is weighing me down and I can control my mind to switch those negative thoughts into positive thoughts. Now, it takes a long time and of course they are still very prevalent, but it somewhat works.
Exercise– Exercising, whether it be running, swimming, or biking, releases endorphins in your brain and make you feel good. It’s a natural way of boosting that “good” feeling, as well as make you feel accomplished and good about yourself
Eating healthy– I will admit, I haven’t been eating healthy for a while. I’ve ordered so much pizza and burgers in the past month, any more would probably turn me into a pizza or burger. I wasn’t taking care of my body, which has been known to correlate to depression. I gained a lot of weight (a symptom) due to lack of motivation and not eating healthy. I’ve tried to shift my eating habits. I’ve tried to intake more protein, vegetables, fruit, and whole grains. I’ve tried to cut back on the sweets and oils that drag me down. I’ve started to take some vitamins to make up for the loss of nutrients my body is craving.
Writing– I’ve been writing this blog along with creating an outline for a story I’ve been working on. Writing is so cathartic. I immerse myself in a new world where I can create anything and you take your mind off of what is bothering you. I go to coffeehouses to write, so I don’t stay and wallow in self-pity.
Art– I’m no artist, but I’ve been experimenting with colored pastels. I’ve done some peaceful pictures to give me a piece of mind. It definitely takes my mind off of what I am thinking and lets me immerse myself into a different world, a world of color.
Listening to Music– Research has shown that music affects people’s moods for the better and helps improve their mood. When I’m sad, I listen to so many different tunes, it all depends what I’m feeling at the moment. Sometimes I’ll listen to Chopin and other times I’ll sing along to Lady Gaga.
I only listed a couple things that work for me that could work for others. But remember, it’s all relative and what may work for me, may not work for others. However, if you need some advice, just go out and do something. You’re going to have to force yourself at first, but it might help you get better. I didn’t mention half the things you could do. Read a book. Watch your favorite sport. Go to your favorite store (don’t be impulsive and spend too much money). Cook. Clean. Hike. Drive your car through beautiful scenery. The possibilities are endless! Just go and do.
Another great and personal article about the stigma of mental illness.
I find it hard to think of a single friend of mine who has not experienced mental health issues in the past few years. There is a growing epidemic within the adolescence of this country and it is a silent but very very deadly one: mental illness.
There is an undeniably HUGE stigma against mental health issues, and although over the past few decade’s it has greatly improved, too many lives are still being ruined or destroyed by mental illness. Mental illness does not only destroy the sufferers life but all of those surrounding the sufferer as well: loved ones, family, friends, class mates. Whether you believe it or not, mental illness has an effect on everybody and anybody.
There is a stigma around mental illness which needn’t be present: people don’t talk about it like they would physical illness. You always hear people moaning about the damn cold they’ve had for…
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Yes, I do realize there is a slowly changing vibe towards mental health on the internet. Before I had to deal with it, I was impressed how well healthy individuals coped with the concept of depression. However, that is the internet world where we must remember that a majority on here might be a minority out there.
Of course, I was wrong. Depression and mental illness is still a taboo. In fact, now jobs ask you if you’ve been diagnosed with MDD or bipolar disorder, as if that’s going to judge your self-worth. I mentioned to a friend I was taking SSRIs and she asked,” Why? You’re fine. This is just a phase.” No, I’m really not fine. I hide my depression well, as does everyone else. Why? Because you have people saying that. If you’ve had depression, you know it’s not a phase; it’s a downward spiral. One that consumes everything in its path.
God forbid you tell anybody that you’re taking anti-depressants or admit your mental illness. It’s similar to saying,”I have an STD, or leprosy“. But mental health is similar to your physical health. Everyone jumps to your side if you show symptoms of a cold. They run out and get you nasal drips, lotion tissues, and gross tablets bombarded with medicines. But, if you show symptoms of poor mental health, people recoil.
I didn’t choose this. I didn’t wake up one day and claim,”I feel like being empty today” or “I’m going to have a panic attack today“. I even work at a depression clinic and I’ve walked in so many times with circles under my eyes, red eyes from crying so much, and sweats-nobody says anything. In fact, they seem to try to avoid it. I’ve heard stories, specifically from my neuropharmacology professor, where people do realize that something is wrong with somebody, but they just avoid it hoping that it’ll get better. But, like any other physical ailment, if it’s left alone, the person will die-either physically, or mentally. If I told my researchers that I was depressed, I honestly don’t think they would care. They would be worried that I was a “loose cannon” and wouldn’t be able to perform my tasks efficiently, even though I kept up my work despite mental illness.
We, as a community, need to start accepting mental illness. We need to be able to say somebody,” Hey, can I take a day off. I had a panic attack earlier and I need to deal with it” without any stigmas. This is why I am coming out; I’m coming out to everyone that I am affected by depression and I take anti-depressants to regulate the neurotransmitters in my brain. That is who I am right now and this is why I, as well as everyone else who suffers from poor mental health, needs support.
1. “I didn’t want to wake up. I was having a much better time asleep. And that’s really sad. It was almost like a reverse nightmare, like when you wake up from a nightmare you’re so relieved. I woke up into a nightmare.” – Ned Vizzini, It’s Kind Of A Funny Story
2. “The so-called ‘psychotically depressed’ person who tries to kill herself doesn’t do so out of quote ‘hopelessness’ or any abstract conviction that life’s assets and debits do not square. And surely not because death seems suddenly appealing. The person in whom Its invisible agony reaches a certain unendurable level will kill herself the same way a trapped person will eventually jump from the window of a burning high-rise. Make no mistake about people who leap from burning windows. Their terror of falling from a great height is still just as great as it would be…
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